mum to be or not to be?

it gotta be a long post
because i'm ranting out from the bottom of my ass to my mouth

mummy would complained that she is out of cash no matter what
even when daddy's around,
she still complained though dad has gone.

i wondered where did she spent all the money to,
dad left a sum of money to her ,
she is the richest among the family now.
but still, she complained she dont have the money to spent over new year.

i always advised her to cut the the spending on buying toto and 4d
she can spend up to 100 over bucks each time.

sometimes, she will whined about uncle should gave her money because we dont have daddy now,
sis should increased her monthly allowance, blahs blahs blahs.

sometimes, i feel pity of her
sometimes, i think she is too much.

now, i use my own money to work, play and study.
i am not extra burden to you anymore
but why are you whining and complaining you dont have money to spend?

you are my mother,
like there was once, you said you will paid for my braces
but the next moment you denied.
okay, nevermind. i'm fine with it.

but why?
mum, all i can said that is you changed.
changed to become more defensive and possessive towards money's issues.

i'm not calculative with you
but you seemed to be calculative single cents with everyone.

sometimes, we are utterly disappointed with you.

though dad is gone,
sometimes, you will still whined about you regretted married to dad blahs blahs blahs.

liked,
when dad just passed away,
one of the will was written that me, angie and may will get $15,000 each
but you get none.

so we decided to get $5000 each out to sub as utility bills

but when the will turned out to be mum, angie and may get $15,000 each
and i was left none,
sis agreed to give me $5000 each
angie and may also tried to persuae you to give $5000 out to me and we daughters forked out $5000 each for utilty bills
your replied was, why must i use my own money to pay for utility bills?

i was stunned.
i'm not sad that i cant get my share
i'm sad that you are so calculative

in the end, you won.
sisters forked out $5000 each for utility bills and you are left with $15,000 untouched.
and i was left none.



nvm.
i will be independent and live with whatever i have with me.
i wont used any single cents from you anymore